Another exam over. Am I happy? No for some reason not. I don't even have energy left to be excited. The exams this semester seem so super emotional for me. Not emotional in the sense that I'm crying or laughing, but rather emotionally draning. I'd even say they are the worst ones yet. Not even in Semester 1 was I this mentally drained. I went in today and I didn't feel anything. No nervous butterflies, no sweat outbreaks or shiver, nothing. I was pretty much just blank.
I recognized the girl in front of me, she was in my tute this semester and at some point in the tute, she mentioned that she "had the attention span of a 3 year old" and was always anxious. SERIOUSLY, she was right. She kept tapping her foot making so much of noise and the girl next to me kept clicking her pen, while the girl behind me shuffled her pens around on the desk non stop. About half way through the exam, people started getting up and just randomly walked out. Finished! Just like that. An exam like this one? After 1 hour? Completely impossible. Unless maybe you finish the 50 Multiple Choice Questions in 15 minutes and the 10 short answer questions in 45 minutes, or don't answer the short answer questions at all? I don't know. But anyway, because people got up so early and it's not like there was 1 or 2 who left, no, almost the entire lecture theater (that lecture theater can hold over 200 people) emptied so quickly. It felt like I was at a trainstation or something. So noisy, so unsettling actually.
...
I don't even want to relax now. All I'm capable of at the moment is zoning out. Pretty much just zombie-ing around. I drove to the city just now and while coming back, my surroundings felt like passing by me in a stream. I felt almost detached ... I guess. Not something you want to feel like when you are driving.
Edit:
I was just listening to a couple of older songs and I actually think that "One Moment In Time" by Whitney Houston would adequately describe the reason why I don't give up in the exams, when I just want to give up because I can't take it any longer. I especially like the chorus, where she sings:
I feel that my moment is when I do convince myself to go on and not give up. Bottomline, this song just needs to be "song of the day" ... So I guess we'll have 2 songs of the day :).
At the end of the day, it's all about determination...
[Tune]
Kings of Woolworths: Take The Strain
Whitney Houston: One Moment In Time
I recognized the girl in front of me, she was in my tute this semester and at some point in the tute, she mentioned that she "had the attention span of a 3 year old" and was always anxious. SERIOUSLY, she was right. She kept tapping her foot making so much of noise and the girl next to me kept clicking her pen, while the girl behind me shuffled her pens around on the desk non stop. About half way through the exam, people started getting up and just randomly walked out. Finished! Just like that. An exam like this one? After 1 hour? Completely impossible. Unless maybe you finish the 50 Multiple Choice Questions in 15 minutes and the 10 short answer questions in 45 minutes, or don't answer the short answer questions at all? I don't know. But anyway, because people got up so early and it's not like there was 1 or 2 who left, no, almost the entire lecture theater (that lecture theater can hold over 200 people) emptied so quickly. It felt like I was at a trainstation or something. So noisy, so unsettling actually.
...
I don't even want to relax now. All I'm capable of at the moment is zoning out. Pretty much just zombie-ing around. I drove to the city just now and while coming back, my surroundings felt like passing by me in a stream. I felt almost detached ... I guess. Not something you want to feel like when you are driving.
Edit:
I was just listening to a couple of older songs and I actually think that "One Moment In Time" by Whitney Houston would adequately describe the reason why I don't give up in the exams, when I just want to give up because I can't take it any longer. I especially like the chorus, where she sings:
I want one moment in time
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
I feel that my moment is when I do convince myself to go on and not give up. Bottomline, this song just needs to be "song of the day" ... So I guess we'll have 2 songs of the day :).
At the end of the day, it's all about determination...
[Tune]
Kings of Woolworths: Take The Strain
Whitney Houston: One Moment In Time
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